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  • Cynthia Veniot

Tips on how to maintain your marriage


I have, in the past, attempted to write about the convoluted concept of love including ways to keep love alive in a relationship. Today’s post is a compliment to these previous articles and will provide a few helpful tips aimed at simply maintaining or “checking up” on a long-term relationship or marriage. These tips are based on my research of registered psychotherapist Janna Comrie’s take on how to keep a union strong.

Emotional Connection

Strengthening an emotional connection can mean re-establishing a line of communication, where you share with your partner your feelings (good or bad). It can also mean going on a real date, where you both dress up and make an effort. Simple gestures, such as spontaneous texts and random acts of physical touch (holding hands, back rubs, etc.) can also reinforce an emotional connection.

Attitude

During disagreements or arguments, it can be easy to lose track of your partner’s perspective. In these instances, you tend to remain stuck seeing the world through your own eyes. This can be very frustrating for your partner. Changing your attitude consists of recognizing (vs. agreeing with) your partner’s point of view on any given matter, and therefore, validating them.

Expectations

Comparing your relationship to others’ can prove difficult for any couple. Your relationship with your partner consists of unique facets which should be celebrated. You can underline these distinct features by talking to your partner about how you will use them to help advance your relationship physically, emotionally, sexually and financially.

Trust

We often find ourselves angry at our partners for fear of their response to you communicating your feelings. It is important to trust your capability to handle conflict with your partner. Your partner is more likely to validate and comfort you if you trust yourself to handle a difficult conversation with them, as well as effectively acknowledge their perspective.

Happiness

The happier you are with yourself, the happier you will be in your relationship. When you are unhappy with yourself, you are more likely to judge your place in the relationship. Alternatively, the happier you are with yourself, the likelier you are to truly see your value in the relationship. Ways to help you become happier with yourself may include making time for friends, exercising, relaxing, trying new things, etc.

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